Abstinence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder
by Liz Sherman
Summary: Addison thinks about the whole 60 Days thing...slight Addisex. OneShot


**Disclaimer and A/N: Definitely don't own Grey's Anatomy or any of its characters (if I did, somethings would most definitely be happening, and other things most definitely would not be). **

**This is a one-shot where Addison contemplates the whole 60 Days thing with Mark. **

**Fun Fact: The world 'sex' is used 26 times in this fic.**

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This "60 Days" pact had been a bad idea. Well, it had been a good idea when it only applied to Mark. It was a bad idea when it applied to her. She had forgotten that Mark liked to give as good as he got.

Addison had never been proud of sleeping with Mark. That didn't change the fact that sleeping with Mark had been amazing. That also didn't change the fact that Mark had practically slept with every available woman in Seattle Grace, and even some of the unavailable ones. Mark was a man-whore. But Addison thrived on giving people second chances. Usually she was wrong, but every now and then, someone proved worthy of that second chance.

Even when that second chance meant that she couldn't have sex. For two months. It wasn't like she had gone this long without sex before. She had. But she had also been married. A sexless marriage seemed inevitable. It happened to everyone. Well, almost everyone, anyway. It definitely happened when the parties involved were sought-after surgeons.

It felt like she was married. Married to Mark? What a horrible thought. But there it was. They had made an agreement, and they weren't having sex. How different was that from her marriage to Derek?

It's not like she could go back on their agreement and have sex. Then it meant that she hadn't taken her own proposal seriously. It meant she had different standards. Well, she did have different standards. Addison was pretty sure Mark hadn't gone more than a week without sex before.

The hospital made this whole no-sex thing painful. All around her were attractive men. Attractive nurses, attractive interns, attractive residents, attractive attendings. All around attractive men. It wasn't fair. Because here she was, single and not allowed to have sex.

The most difficult part of this whole thing was her intern. Alex. Alex Karev made things difficult. They had almost kissed. Addison thought about what the actual kiss would have been like. Then they had kissed. It had left Addison wanting more. He had walked away. That had also left Addison wanting more. When he had dragged her into that supply closet, she had thought there would be a different ending to that encounter.

And now she imagined all the ways that encounter could have ended. She imagined all the different places an attending and an intern could go and not be seen. A locked on-call room. An empty OR. The third floor bathrooms. The possibilities were endless. And they filled her brain.

Addison never had thought this much about sex before. Sex was something that happened. It was not something she planned, not something she thought about all day. It wasn't until she wasn't allowed to have it that it consumed her. She was always one to want what she couldn't have. Normally Addison had much more control over her desires. But now her desires were be dangled in front of her, and even if she wanted to do something about fulfilling them, she couldn't.

Or could she? Was Mark important enough to her that she would give up something that she desperately (and she meant desperately) wanted?

This whole no-sex thing was clouding Addison's head. Maybe she didn't even want Karev. Maybe just the idea of something out of reach was the real attraction.

Or maybe it was his smile. Maybe it was his way of saying the right thing at the most unexpected moments. Maybe it was the way his mouth had felt on hers. Maybe it was the way her arm had tingled at his touch. Maybe it's the way she became breathless whenever the two of them were alone.

Having no sex made her like sex more. Maybe this no-sex thing was going to make her appreciate sex. As if she didn't already appreciate sex with Mark. Mark-sex was good sex. That was a simple truth. But what if Addison wanted to have sex with someone else?

Addison had asked Mark, "Who would I be having sex with?"

When she had asked that question, an answer had flitted to her mind before she brushed the thought away. Mark had smirked at her as though he knew what she was thinking. He was about to make a snide remark, but Addison had walked away.

Addison became contemplative when she wasn't having sex, even if it was just becoming more contemplative _about_ sex. It wasn't like she hadn't wanted him before she stopped having sex. She just wanted him even more now.

"Who would I be having sex with?"

It was painfully clear.

It was painfully clear when she paged him that night. It was painfully clear when she locked the on-call room door. It was painfully clear the next morning when he was pulling on his scrubs. It was painfully clear when he kissed her before he left.

This whole no-sex thing was probably a good idea in theory. Just like socialism, it only worked in theory. When put in practice, it made people miserable. Addison was not one to make herself miserable. Not when it could be prevented, anyway.

Addison was sure that she could have made it the full 60 days. The reality was that she didn't want to. When you knew what you wanted, why not go for it?


End file.
